I Once Ate a Superbad Pineapple, Girl Said My Semen Tasted Horrible

One of the most debated questions is which is better, Superbad or Pineapple Express. Both of these films are piss your pants funny, have memorable moments and are very quotable.  Both are made from the same group of people, so there are plenty of jokes that make you look like a full fledged retard when your laughing.  I am a huge fan of both movies, I really am, but in my opinion, one of the movies reigns supreme... and thats Pineapple Express.  I'm going to explain why Pineapple takes a shit on Superbad's chest for comedy supremacy.

VS.

Like I said above, I'm a fan of both and I'm not dissing Superbad. If Pineapple Express is #1, Superbad is #1A.  What gets me going though is when people say that Superbad is better.  They're basically spewing shit out of their pieholes.  One of the reasons behind my theory is because I can never see myself in a situation like the guys of Pineapple Express were in.  It was hysterical how Ted Jones sent his goons Matheson and Budlofsky after the dynamic duo of stoners in Dale and Saul.  It was a huge series of unfortunate events for Mr. Denton, and thats why its funny.  Superbad was something I could see myself getting into during high school (minus some of the problems they went through) with the struggle of getting alcohol to be drunk off my ass by 11pm in our friends basements like a bunch of prepubescent little shitheads.

I'm also a bigger fan of the plot in Pineapple Express.  I mean the whole point of Superbad is getting alcohol for a party at a girl's house to try and impress them and it goes through their trials and tribulations of getting there.  For the record, after seeing the movie I wanted to try Goldshlick Vodka and Kyle's Killer Lemonade  (Tommyboy actually thought that existed, what a fucking moron).  Emma Stone wasn't what she is today, she was maybe a 5?, and thats being generous.
Superbad Emma Spiderman Emma 

In Pineapple, Ted Jones and his rouge african cop lady friend plug some asain guy right in the head and his brains spew all over Ted Jones's window like a container of Lo Main.  They than notice Dale who is a process server, sitting outside the house frantically drive away out of fear and the movie is about Ted finding and neutralizing the witness.  I'm not gonna give the whole plot away because if you haven't seen it, its a must before you die.

Here is one of my favorite scenes from Superbad.
Fogal (or McLovin) just has dead meat written all over him. It was basically a suicide mission.  Kind of reminds me of this kid.  Although I do admire his attempt at seeming of age by dropping the "Been drinking this stuff for years" line.  Hey, at least he gave it the old college try.

And here is one of my many favorite Pineapple scenes.  The whole dialog between his high school girlfriend's father and him is hysterical.  Dale really thought on his head with that fake name too, Garagely was absolutely genius.









I can literally go on and on talking about these movies but it would just give everything away, and were not in that business, were in the reviewing and getting wasted business.  So if you've haven't seen either one of these movies, do so, and if you've seen both you already have your opinion on which one is better.  I respect everyones opinion (just kidding, if you think Superbad is better, go walk on some legos barefooted you Lemming).  Now if you excuse me, I'm going to enjoy a nice plate of couscous, the food so nice, they named it twice, while fucking Jewels.