First of all I would like to apologize to the cube monkeys out there for getting this blog out there super late. Today I'm going to go over the career of Tom Hanks. I figured I'd veer away from the comedy/action actors/actresses today. Tom has been in films before I was even swimming around in my Dad's nuts (1992) so he's got a bunch of miles on his illustrious career. Worldwide his movies have grossed over $8.5 Billion, making him one of the highest grossing actors in history. That's pretty God damn impressive to say the least, good for him, good for him.
I found this picture hysterical, so I put it on, this is no way shape or form a reflection of his career.
Tom busted out on the scene after his role in Big (1988). He played the role of a child who wished to become big and over night became an adult. Looking at him from the outside not knowing what happened, you would probably think he was retarded based on how he carried himself throughout society. He was a manchild. It was actually a very good film, and the numbers speak for themselves since it made $151 million worldwide which was amazing for 1988. He was also nominated for an academy award for best actor that year, which he lost to Dustin Hoffman's role in Rain Man in which he played an autistic man. Big year for the mentally disoriented roles. I did not see the movie Philadelphia (1993) but he won the academy award for his role as Andrew Beckett, so I'd say he obviously did something right. In 1994 Tom won back to back academy awards for best actor after Tom's lead role in Forrest Gump. Forrest Gump is an American classic that I've seen numerous times in my life. Tom played the aforementioned Forrest Gump and the movie was about his life and showed us what this man went through. Forrest wasn't the brightest bulb on the tree but he didn't let that affect him. He won awards from the military for serving in Vietnam, was a world renowned ping pong player, a shrimp enthusiast but most importantly showed us, the viewer, life lessons. "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what your going to get" is one of the most used sayings still, and it actually is true about life. Unless your a baby born into a family with a silver spoon in your mouth, if you're one of those kids, fuck you.
One of the rolls I will forever love Tom for was his voice as Woody in the Toy Story trilogy which started in 1995 and was concluded in 2010. I have literally nothing negative to say about Toy Story. I grew up watching them and I feel that I can relate to the "main" character Andy a lot. It showed us Andy growing up from being a little kid to going off to college. The movies focused more on Woody and Buzz and the trials and tribulations Andy's toys went through. I am not ashamed to say that I tear up every time due to the ending of Toy Story 3. It's an absolute lock that one tear will be shed, and if you don't tear up, your a ginger and have no soul. In 1998 Tom was nominated for another academy award for the WWII classic Saving Private Ryan. SPR is viewed as one of the most realistic reenactments of what it was like for the brave men who stormed the beaches of Normandy and helped win the hellacious blood bath against the Nazi regime. The first time I saw the movie was in 8th grade during Social Studies class and had to have a permission slip signed by my parents due to the blood and guts. This is another Tom Hanks movie I can't help but tear up at the end because of the historical impact plus the attachment I gained to the numerous soldiers the movie showed. Every time I snipe someones head off in a videogame, I usually say "God give me strength", paying homage to SPR's sniper who is a boss. The final battle scene fighting of the German's is riveting and unbelieveable. The only complaint is that Upham, the pussy who was supposed to supply ammo for the men didn't die.
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In 1999 Tom was in the movie The Green Mile which also featured the late Michael Clarke Duncan (RIP) and it was a great watch. Tom struck gold with his performance in Cast Away (2000). It was about a man who worked for FedEx that wound up getting stranded on an island by himself after a delivery went bad and how he handled life. Things we take for granted such as water, food, shelter, warmth, clothing and maybe most importantly, companionship, were all struggles Tom's character Chuck faced. Chuck took a volleyball from the wreckage, befriended it, and named him Wilson (the balls brand). Gravity, which was mentioned in Themigs's blog, is a complete and utter ripoff of this concept, only in space (Like Anthony said, he couldn't have hit the nail harder on the head). Tom was again nominated for an academy award for best actor for his performance, which he lost to Russell Crowe for his role in Gladiator. In 2002 he teamed up with Leo and Spielberg in Catch Me If You can which I saw for the first time in Mrs. Bennett's accounting class senior year of high school. She had absolutely no control of her class whatsoever, great times. CMIYC was an enjoyable movie based on true events. Watch it if you can, you won't be disappointed. He's also known for his voice in the Christmas movie (Yes, I said Christmas, none of that liberal "Holiday" bullshit up in this blog) Polar Express (2004), The Da Vinci Code (2006), Angels and Demons (2009), Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (2011) and most recently Captain Phillips (2013). Captain Phillips was nominated for a total of 6 academy awards, unfortunately losing all 6, but don't read much into it, it was a fabulous film. It was about a cargo ship that gets hijacked by a bunch of malnourished Somalian pirates, who resembled some of Kony's finest soldiers, and tried to make a quick buck. The rest of it's up to you to find out, I'm not giving any more of the details away. Watch it for yourself and see how the story unfolds.
This has been my longest blog, and it could have went on a lot longer talking about the career of Tom Hanks. I tried to give the man his due diligence for entertaining the millions who have seen his films over the years. He is one of the most well respected men in the biz. I wish there were more actors like Tom Hanks, everything the guy says is a stitch.
Chances are when you were growing up, you watched the WWF at least once (It's still the WWF in my eyes, fuck that dumb panda and the World Wildlife Foundation). There were the likes of the beer guzzling, middle finger flipping Stone Cold Steve Austin, the 22-0 Undefeated Deadman, The Undertaker (He still is undefeated at Wrestlemania, the refs messed up the count), and the pie eating, eyebrow raising, jabroni beating, the People's Champ, THE ROCK. The Rock is the biggest wrestler ever to succeed out of the ring, and there's no question about it. If I could switch lives with him for one day, I would do it without question. He probably gets so much puss with the beautiful temple of his body that he works endless hours a day working on. He was the most electrifying man in Sports Entertainment and he continues to bring it on the big screen.
Wrestling Career: In November of 1996, The Rock debuted in at Survivor Series, one of the
"Big 4" WWE PPVs. Athleticism was in his blood. He played football at the University of Miami as a backup to Warren Sapp (NFL HOF'er). Since he saw football wasn't his route in life, he followed his father and grandfather's route and joined wrestling. He had all the pieces necessary to become a superstar. His physique was amazing, his polarizing skills on the mic and was able to fire up the crowd like no one else could. He went through bouts with wrestling legends like Stone Cold, Mic Foley, Chris Jericho and Hulk Hogan. The Rock left in 2004 to pursue his acting career and returned to the ring 2011 for some long term part-time gigs passing the torch off to John Cena and CM Punk. He wrestled at Wrestlemania 28 and 29 facing John Cena, going 1-1, dropping the belt to him at Wrestlemania 29, which he won off of CM Punk at the 2013 Royal Rumble in January. Wrestlemania 30 was this year and he, Stone Cold and Hulk Hogan opened the show with an awesome promo that made the little child in me jump up and down in excitement. It was one of the coolest promos I've ever seen, period. He will without a doubt be inducted into the WWE Hall Of Fame when the time comes, and I hope he has at least one more match left in him because he suffered some severe injuries against John Cena at Wrestlemania 29. Here are some of the most memorable and iconic moments The Rock so far in his WWE career.
Acting Career: This was perhaps the hardest step Dwayne took in his professional career, trying to go to the big screen and movies. People were very skeptic about his transition and if he would succeed... and boy did he. His movies grossed a total of $1.3 BILLION, with a B in 2013, which was the most among any actor or actress. No one can get enough of The Rock, hes a megastar. His first feature film was The Scorpion King in 2002. From there, he went on to lead in The Rundown and Walking Tall. The first serious, non action roll he played was Gridiron Gang. He played a football coach who coached a group of kids who had problems staying out of trouble off the field. He instilled faith and discipline in them, showing them someone cared about them, and thats what they needed in their life. They wound up losing in the championship game, but they won in life. It was a very feel good story, and I feel The Rock executed that role perfectly. He is well known for his roles in the Fast And Furious series. He appeared in FF 5, 6 and is currently filming 7 which is being fixed due to the tragic passing of Paul Walker (RIP). My favorite movie in which he appeared was Pain And Gain. Themigs touched on this movie in his blog yesterday so head over there and read it or watch the movie yourself, and have your mind blown away. He made me feel bad for his character, be scared of his character, laugh at his character and sympathise for his character all in the same movie. Not to mention my other Man Crush Mark Wahlberg was in it, so it was an absolute must for me to see. Hercules is scheduled to be released on July 27th, The Rock's next featured film and hes currently filming his next film San Andreas which should also be a box office giant.
I'll admit he really isn't the greatest actor, staying mainly with action rolls, but thats ok. He brings more to the table than acting, he's a huge name that draws people to the movies and sells tickets. He does his job. People pay to see him, he puts people in the seats, exactly like he did in the WWE. Dwayne is one of the biggest names in Hollywood, and I don't see that ending anytime soon. I'd pay him money to Rock Bottom or People's Elbow me, but I don't think he would need the cash because his net worth is $70 Million. I just hope to run into him one day just to say I've met The People's Champ, The Rock.
Jonah is the loveable Hollywood actor whose weight fluxuates faster than a retarded 6 year old hyped up on mountain dew bouncing off the walls. He has been in many movies that have been viewed by millions. The amount of money they brought in can probably support his food bill for a solid 4 months. It's like he has a very deathly disease thats just eating him away, he might wanna get this checked out. Although I did bag on him at the end of my Fab 5 blog, I do actually enjoy his work. So lets dive in to his career like he does the all you can eat buffets.
We were first introduced to Jonah Hill frantically telling people to ask him about his small jewish weiner in the movie Accepted. After than, his obese star to fame started to shoot across big screens worldwide. 2007 was a big year for him. He was in 2 comedy juggernauts, Superbad and Knocked Up. He had more of a prominent main character in Superbad than he was Knocked Up, but that helped him form a nice relationship with Seth Rogan which he has appeared in movies with since than. Jonah's character in Superbad, Seth, was at a party and having a great time dancing with some hot chick. She was grinding all up on his johnson and Seth was loving it. After his grind sesh, he found out she just used him as a tampon and just spewed her period blood all over him, fucking classic. That was one of the memorable scenes from the movie that showcased Jonah's talents and set him up for stardom.
In 2009, he was alongside Adam Sandler in the Comedy/Drama Funny People. I was a fan of that movie, but it could've been cut in half and still been the same thing. It was kind of a more serious role for Jonah which was exactly what he needed to pave his way into 2 Academy Award nominated roles in the near future. Moneyball (2011) was the first serious roll Jonah had. The movie was about the Oakland Athletics and the "moneyball" theory that GM Billy Beane used to build his team that actually saw success while spending close to nothing. Billy Beane was played by Brad Pitt. After that movie I loved Brad because he packed so many lips throughout it, and that is fucking awesome. Jonah played his assistant/scout and was a key part to Beane's success with the team. This role gave Jonah his first Academy Award nomination for Best Supporting Actor, which he lost, but it was really good for Jonah to transform his usual comedic character.
In 2012 Jonah teamed up Channing Tatum in 21 Jump Street which was nice to see him continue his funny comedy roles, but with a different cast of people. They had pretty good chemistry, enough to come out with 22 Jump Street during this Summer 2014. 2013 gave Jonah his second nod at an Academy Award nomination with his roll in The Wolf Of Wallstreet working alongside the stallion of a man known as Leo Dicaprio. Jonah played a jew (which was easy for him) who worked alongside Leo in their scam to make millions off stocks while ripping people off along the way. They loved sex, drugs and partying which looked like a grand ol' time. Would've loved to have been to one of their parties. I would've been fine sitting in the corner jerking it to Leo plowing out his (NSFW) SMOKESHOW of a wife. She could have the Clap and I would still without a doubt risk it to get that biscuit, but back to Jonah. 2013 we were also presented with This Is The End in which Jonah got raped by a demon with a big big black dick. Thats the kind of stuff that happens in prison. Poor guy didn't stand a chance. This Is The End was a hysterical movie which featured a bunch of comedy stars/friends, highly recommended.
I'm excited to see what Jonah has for us in the future. He has shown that he can be a comedy genius and than perform a very serious role, something not many actors in Hollywood can do today. I will admit though I do love fat Jonah. Skinny Jonah isn't that cool, he thinks hes better than us. Stay true to your roots, stop going on these outlandish diets. Your a fat guy Jonah, embrace it, live it, love it.
P.S - I still have a boner from that Margot Robbie picture, heres a few more to get through this Humpday 1234
...aaaaaaaand now im like
I wont beat around the bush. Ashton Kutcher sucks. Everything about him sucks. On a good day he's a disappointing Sean William Scott knockoff and on every other day he's a skid mark on Hollywood's underwear. It is beyond me how he is still getting jobs. And yes, that was a pun relating to his role as Steve Jobs, who is probably slitting his wrists in his grave knowing who the loser is who is defining his life in his movie. I guarantee Steve Jobs would prefer Peter Dinklage to play him, not taking shots at the incredible actor that Dinklage is, but rather to show that a midget would be a more convincing portrayal of Jobs than Ashton Kutcher. Now I've never seen "Jobs" so it could be a phenomenal film, but knowing Kutcher has the main role I can assume the movie will be as big a disappointment as the rest of his career. I'll give you guys a breakdown that not only ruins Brustacus's credibility but opens your eyes to the shit that spews out of every pore of Kutcher's body.
New Years Eve: Kutcher plays himself, which is a miserable hipster. In the movie he is trapped in an elevator in his pajama's so self absorbed that he refuses to befriend or acknowledge the chick in the elevator. Now her facial features (nose, mouth, eyes, etc) are significantly too big for the rest of her face, but other than that I wouldn't deny her the fuck she was begging for. Now I know that was his character and not him persay but I feel that portion of the story consisted of the worst acting performance of the movie.
Two and a Half Men: This is where Brustacus contradicts himself. He put Charlie Sheen on his fab 5 team then immediately stabs him in the back by praising Kutcher. It's clear that the show is about two and a half times worse with Kutcher instead of Sheen. No brainer there. Sheen was a dry humor, sarcastic mastermind and Kutcher is a boring fuck.
What Happen's in Vegas: A Keanu Reeves performance carried by the gorgeous Cameron Diez. Simple as that.
Dude, Where's My Car?: Entertaining but entertaining in a "Scary movie"/"Date Movie"/ any type of parody movie kind of way. Any actor could have played his part and it would have been the same exact movie.
That's 70's Show: I don't know the show well. I hate the 70's, I hate Kutcher, and therefore, I hate the show. I assume the only actual comedy from the show comes from the Dad or Grandpa or whoever the hilarious medium old guy is.
The Butterfly Effect: Awesome movie, loved every second. Kutcher does solid. The god awful '96 Jets won one game during the 1996 season. The disgusting Lyle Lovett married Julia Roberts for a few years. Aaron Boone hit a homerun against the Sox in the 2003 ALCS. Every dog has his day.
Sorry Kunis, but you have a serious case of the Julia Roberts, except your Lovett is twice the loser.
Kunis Pics: 12345
*Update*
I forgot to acknowledge the title of this post. Friday we have off for the 4th of July so the days of the week get pushed forward. Monday becomes Tuesday, Tuesday becomes Wednesday, and so on and so on. Therefore, Tuesday is Humpday, end of story.
If you grew up in the 2000's, chances are you've seen at least one episode of That 70's Show and loved Michael Kelso aka Ashton Kutcher. He was the loveable stupid member of the crew that baked out Eric's basement on the reg. Kelso also was dating one of the hottest smokes in Point Place, Wisconsin, Jackie Burkhart who was played by the ravishing Russian Mila Kunis (I will get back to her later). He was basically living the High School dream and I would trade places with him in a heart beat to have Mila Kunis as my girl friend. Even if you were living in a refrigerator box, saying Mila Kunis is your girl friend is a Hole In One on a Par 5.
Ashton than went on to playing a very similar character in the movie Dude, Where's My Car? Ashton and Seann William Scott portrayed 2 best friends who after a night of solid blacking out and winning a lifetime supply of pudding, completely forgot where their car was. Sure, the premises of the movie sounds like half retarded monkey could come up with, but I can relate. I tend to get a bit reckless myself from time to time and wake up with not a clue of what happened the night before, shame, and a puddle of puke or pizza crust bed side. This movie was a staple of my childhood. I recently watched about half of it at a party with my friends and was able to recite just about every line. From "Dude, what does mine say?!", to ZOLTAN!, there are many parts of this movie that will have you pissing your pants. I still have this movie in my Top 10 comedies that I've ever seen, and will defend it to the death of me (Which will be around the age of 39 at the rate I eat/lack of physical activity). If you've never seen this movie, you should probably stop reading this and go do so, than come back when you finish.
MTV gave Ashton his own show in 2003 when he became the host of Punk'd which was a show where celebs were set up in jokes and saw their reaction unfold in front of hidden cameras. It was a funny show to see how celebrities react when things go haywire. Ashton was in the spotlight more than ever.
In 2004, we were introduced to a side of Ashton that we have never seen, a very serious role in The Butterfly Effect. I thoroughly enjoy this movie. He has the ability to travel back in time and change things in his life for the better. He than realizes that every thing he does, something negative happens in the future that affects either him, his family, or his circle of friends. There were a few dark and twisted scenes in the movie that either kept you on the edge of your seat, or cringing in disbelief/disgust. This was the role that proved to Hollywood that Ashton wasn't just a comedy actor, and had what it took to expand his acting repertoire.
He's appeared in a bunch of other movies like Just Married, Cheaper By The Dozen, Guess Who, What Happens In Vegas, and most recently Jobs portraying the life of Steve Jobs. He now is also on the show Two and a Half Men, replacing Charlie Sheen. In 2013 Ashton also gave a speech at the Teen Choice Awards after receiving the Ultimate Choice Award (which is probably as prestegious as a pile of dog shit, but whatever) that was heard by millions and quite inspirational. Here is his full acceptance speech. Back to Mila Kunis. Life came full circle for fans of the show because now Mila and Ashton are now engaged and are expecting a child. What a lucky guy he is that he got to give his seed to such a stallion of a women. That baby is probably going to be the most beautiful person ever when their older, book it.
A man who submerged himself so deep in the role of maniac he turned into one himself.
A man who womanized the unwomanizable average looking chick in 10 Things I Hate About You.
A man who made millions of people uncomfortable when he banged Jake Gyllenhaal in a tent.
A man who was somehow able to actually be Bob Dylan, understand him, and portray him in a way that does him justice. Let it be known that this isn't easy because no one knows Bob Dylan. No one understands Bob Dylan. Bob Dylan doesn't even know how to be Bob Dylan. Bob Dylan is of a different species and he had no idea what he was saying at any point in his entire life. (It'll all make sense or not make sense if you watch "I'm Not There")
Anyway, we're here to honor Heath Ledger, whose insanity caused solely to provide us with entertainment led to his demise. I mean you can't fully submerge yourself in the role as the joker and think you'll make it out alive, but I'm not arguing that that was one of the best acting performances I've ever seen in my life. Ledger was without question an incredible actor, and the world is a worse place without him.
Is That Bob Dylan?
Fun Fact: That Chick got plowed out by a black dude in the movie "O"
This is not a blog about the 1991 Michigan Wolverine Men's Basketball team. Although I would love to talk about Jalen Rose and the infamous Crack House incident, I'll save that for another time. The point of this blog is a combination of what this site does, Movies/TV and Booze. I'm here to answer the age old question of who would be the best group of guys to have the night of your life that would give Hangover 1 a run for its money. And I say Hangover 1 because who in their right mind would willingly want to go to Bangkok (Hangover 2) and party, that place is full of transexuals and poor people, no bueno.
My first selection would have to go to Thad Castle who is played by Alan Ritchson. Thad is the star Linebacker on the dominate Blue Mountain State football team. Not only does he kick ass on the field, but he also parties like an absolute animal and slaughters pussy. He is such a wildcard that he takes rabies before his games to give him an extra edge. I can only imagine the things he would do in Vegas. He would more than likely impregnate a few women or end up in a jail cell.
My second choice would have to go to Kenny Powers who is played by Danny McBride. Kenny Powers had a roller coaster career in the MLB, but you can't deny his lifestyle. The guy lives everyday like its his last, making the most of everything. He snorts coke like its going out of style, and I love that. I'n not saying I dabble with booger sugar, or support it, but you have to admire his dedication to his craft. He's an athlete as well, and bitches love athletes. Any guy who jetskis with topless women is welcomed on my team any day.
Steering away from the athletes, my third selection would have to be Mark Wahlberg. You could say I have a man crush for Marky Mark, and I'm not afraid to admit it. He's a stallion. I know if there was a problem, Mark would have your back no matter what. He had a wild side as a kid, beating up on minorities and not giving a fuck. You wouldn't want to fuck with a man like Mark. He blinded an elderly Vietnamese man when he was 16 (The dude probably had it coming, thats on you buddy). He also is responsible for one of the best songs ever created in Good Vibrations. If that song doesn't get your dick hard, you probably have erectile disfunction and I feel bad for you
Channing Tatum would get my 4th spot. He has gained a hell of a lot of respect out of me after his roles in 21 and 22 Jump Street and changed my view of him as a pillow biting homosexual. You know we would be surrounded by waves of gorgeous women trying to get their boxes stuffed by him. Sex drips off of him when he wakes up in the morning. He's probably turned down more beejs in his life than I've received. Channing can take the 10's, I'll gladly take his 7's with a smile on my face. Trickle down effect, pretty recognizable method made famous by Ronald Reagan.
Rounding out this squad of extraordinary gentlemen is Charlie Sheen. His history has been well documented. Oh he had a drug problem worse than Whitney Houston (and he's still standing, ha!) and got killed off in Two And A Half Men, but who cares? The guy just wins at life. He has a stronger passion to get absolutely fucked up and rail out hookers than I have for Taco Bell, and thats saying something. Sure its possible he has some STDs and illegitimate children out there, but that's how Charlie rolls. I need this guy on my squad like yesterday.
And this rounds out my Fab 5. I accept the fact that I would probably die if we went out one night together, but this is a risk that you have to take. These guys don't fuck around, balls to the wall pedal to the medal action. Do yourself a favor and wear a Go Pro that night, because it will be one for the record books. Comment below any substitutions you would make, or if you would go with a completely different 5.
P.S. - I really thought about putting Jonah Hill in there just because he's fatter than me and it would make me look better, he just doesn't bring anything else to the table. Step up your game Jonah
Heath Ledger actually holds a pretty special place in my heart. Not because like Jake Gyllenhaal I was railed out in a tent by him in secrecy for twenty years, but probably because my freshman year me and one of my roommates legitimately watched The Dark Knight every night an entire semester. I shit you not I completely get how Heath Ledger went crazy being the Joker because I started to feel batshit just by watching him go insane playing the joker. All that being said, its a shame this guy died so young and I felt it appropriate to discuss the good the bad and the homosexual of Heath's career.
And Here....We...Go.....
Best Movie- Tie between The Dark Knight and The Patriot
Now look I know I just told you that I watched TDK about 100 times one semester but that doesn't take away from the fact that The Patriot is one badass movie. Not only do you get to see a arguable breakout role from Ledger, but Mel Gibson and like 8 rednecks pretty much take down the entire British army. I seriously think that when Mel kills a guy in a movie he is actually murdering that guy in real life. So much raw anger that he just unloads on innocent extras in his movies. When a man signs up for a Mel Gibson film he puts his life in peril Anyway, even though Ledgers performance was easily better in TDK I felt obligated to pay homage to The Patriot, especially with the Fourth coming in hot.
Seriously has anyone made more of a career off of being a deush than the guy who plays Lucius Malfoy and Colonel Tavington?
Best Performance- Upset Alert Ennis Del Mar in Brokeback Mountain
I know if anyone actually reads this shit I'd get heat for this, but hear me out. I absolutely loved Heath's performance as The Joker, BUT, I gotta be honest his performance as an angry and confused cowboy really made that movie for me. In a movie where you otherwise get to see raunchy gay sex, seeing an incredible acting performance really helps to make you forget about that. Like alright imagine the acting was horrible in that film? It would just be two guys banging in secrecy for 2 and a half hours. I would watch a Tom Cruise documentary if I was interested in that.
You guys def thought I was throwing something gay on here. Just enjoy Jake Gyllenhaal as bubble boy.(terrible film)
Most Underrated Movie- Lords of Dogtown
This movie is a solid flick, but everyone can agree Heaths performance as drunken skating revolutionary Skip Engbloom is spot on according to Engblooms filthy hippy friends. I feel like that's gotta be a sweet role to take on. Yeah Heath we need you to move to California smoke weed and be a drunken guy who likes to surf. Sign me up. But seriously anyone who hasn't seen this movie or his performance in it needs to check it out. Even if you dont like skating or surfing you wont get a better taste of the California lifestyle in the 70's without watching this.
We're so punk rock that we climb fences. Hang loose bro
For a guy who is a multiplatinum music artist oscar winner and potential father of daenerys targarians unborn children Jared Leto really does not get the appreciation he deserves in hollywood. Is that because hes one of those weirdo fucking vegetarian guys whose probably the closest real life person you can get to owen wilson in meet the parents? Probably, but I really think that its ridiculous how little recognition this guy gets
Requiem for a dream is a fucking wacky ass movie if you havent seen it watch it and get ready to not only appreciate how j leets transforms himself into a strung out heroin junkie, but also develop a real admiration for the size and bodaciousness of a young Jennifer Connolys tits.
Dallas Buyers Club not only turned the king of Rom Coms into an oscar winner, but Jay Jay also turned in an oscar performance as well. He managed to eek out Michael Fassbender in 12 years a Slave and an extremely Jewish Jonah Hill in the Wolf of Wall Street. Oh yeah he also did it by playing a transgender man whose dying of aids.
Better looking than courtney love?
And as if being an awesome actor wasn't enough, this mother fucker has the audacity to start a god damn band with his brother on the drums. Im too fucking lazy to walk my dog in my spare time, and this piece of shit starts a multi platinum selling band. The kill is gay as fuck but I love it
I also think this guy just trys to wear eyeliner in any situation he can. Like oh were shooting a music video better throw on some guyliner
If all of this bullshit wasnt enough, Im trying to generate some heat on a conspiracy theory that hes actually a vampire. Because hes so underrated it really gets thrown under the rug that this son of a bitch hasnt aged in like 15 years. But im onto you motherfucer
Like what the fuck is going on here? Does this guy bathe in the blood of virgins or does he sacrifice to Cthulu?
Wait but it gets even better. This lucky guy also gets to (allegedly) bang Daenerys Targarian from the Game of Thrones Series. Ok whatever you can be rich and handsome and famous but now your telling me you also get to bang khaleesi cmon man. This video is pretty much Jared being like I have not seen your show I recognize what a baller I am but I will still allow you to sleep with me. The fucking father of dragons. I wouldnt be surprised if he watched the show and forced her to bleach her hair blonde permanently just because it pleases him.
It wouldnt shock me if he demanded he be written into Game of thrones and just usurped the Iron Throne no questions asked. Like ah shit Jared of house Leto is here guess we better bend the knee
Hey Jared if your reading this fuck you but more importantly keep doing you
